Every day at least once, I think about the fact that I have
no children. It is painful. There is a
crazy long list of reasons that I have not become a parent. Most of my reasons for staying childless,
have nothing to do with me, and everything to do with the climate of our
world. I am a worrier, I worry about my
dogs when I’m not home, I worry about John while he’s on the road, I worry
about my friends all the time. I can
barely enjoy a vacation because I worry about something happening at home while
I’m gone. These are all fairly normal things to worry
about, and if that’s all there was I would probably be a Mother by now. I am totally confident in my ability to
parent, and I have total faith in my partner to be exceptional. So why? Why not do that thing that people do when they
are committed and in love, why not create new life?
Our world is in crisis.
Our country is in crisis. The human race is in crisis. I know, I know I’m such a negative Nancy, and
I shouldn’t let the world dictate what I do with my life. In my personal opinion I find all of that “logic”
to be total bullshit. I am responsible
for the life I provide for my theoretical children, even if I didn’t create the
problems of the world, I am responsible for protecting said children from them,
and I can’t, nobody can. People are
taking babies from their homes, and selling them to the highest bidder, they
are using our stolen children in sex trafficking rings. Our country is run by people who LIE and take
advantage of our collective ignorance.
We are collectively ignorant.
There is a race war that is reaching its boiling point, that I don’t
care to force my would be bi-racial children into. Our water is dirty where we have it, our air
is dirty, our food is contaminated.
Quality education is only available to those who are fortunate enough to
be able t buy it.
Beyond all of the practical and technical reasons, there is
the issue of our world being overpopulated with shitty people. People are fucking mean. People are ruthless, they are selfish, they
don’t care about what is happening to their neighbor. Kids are killing themselves over being
bullied to the point that they lose all hope.
People are having kids because they feel like it, not because they are
equipped to do so. Schools are getting
shot up, and children are being massacred.
School shootings are a political platform, not a human issue that our
politicians are using their power to help solve. Everything, all of the time, is all about the
votes. We aren’t people anymore, we are
number sand we are collateral damage.
I can’t speak for everyone, and I don’t want to. These are
just the thoughts that race through my mind when I think about creating a new
person for the world to devour. Hell, if
you can do it and mold a functional, well rounded person than kudos to you. This just isn’t a world that I want for any
child, so I won’t make a new ones.
